The Duoly blog
What wears a couple down, what holds it together, and what you can concretely do about it. In-depth articles on communication, mental load, attachment and desire — grounded in published research, cited with its authors.
The 4 habits that damage a relationship (and what to do instead)
Attacking, contempt, getting defensive, shutting down: the four habits that wear a couple out, how to spot them at home, and what to say instead tonight.
08/17/2026
The mental load in a relationship: when one of you always has to remember everything
The dentist, the birthday gift, the milk that ran out: why “just tell me what to do” doesn't help, and how to truly share the mental load as a couple.
08/17/2026
Attachment theory: why one of you needs to talk and the other needs space
An unanswered text, one partner worries, the other feels smothered: attachment theory explained simply, and how to break the cycle together.
08/17/2026
Loss of desire in a relationship: why it happens and how to get it back
Still in love, but the spark has dimmed? Why desire fades in long relationships, what really holds it back, and how to talk about it without hurting each other.
08/17/2026
Better communication in a relationship: the small moments that change everything
A “hm” without looking up, an “oh, cool” to good news: communication in a couple happens in tiny moments. What actually works, in concrete terms.
08/17/2026
Couple rituals: the small daily moments that last longer than big resolutions
Your weekly date night didn't make it past February? Why ten minutes a day matters more, and how to create a couple ritual that actually sticks.
08/17/2026
How to argue as a couple without hurting each other
Starting gently, knowing when to take a break, making up the next day: how to get through a fight as a couple without damage, with words to use tonight.
08/17/2026
Money in a relationship: why it gets tense, and how to talk about it
One small purchase and the mood turns: money fights are rarely about the numbers. What's really going on, and how to talk about money without a fight.
10/07/2026
Your relationship after a baby: why it's so hard, and how to stay a team
Exhaustion, more arguments, no time for two: after a baby, many couples wobble. It's common, and the things that protect a relationship are well known.
10/07/2026
Jealousy in a relationship: normal or toxic? Where the line is
A pang when their phone lights up is human. Going through it is not. Understanding jealousy, calming it, and knowing where the line is.
10/07/2026
The 5 love languages: what holds up, and what doesn't
Taken the 5 love languages quiz? What the research really says about it, and how to use it to understand each other better instead of boxing yourselves in.
10/07/2026
The phone between you: when screens get in the way of your relationship
You're talking, they're scrolling. What phones really change in a relationship, and a few simple rules you can try together tonight.
10/07/2026
Forgiveness in a relationship: what it is, and what it isn't
Forgiving isn't forgetting, excusing, or being obliged to stay. How forgiveness really works after a hurt or a betrayal, in plain terms.
10/07/2026
Expecting too much from your relationship: what if that's the problem?
Lover, best friend, confidant, coach: we expect everything from one person. Why that's exhausting, and three simple ways to give your relationship some air.
10/07/2026
Feeling lonely in a relationship: where it comes from, and how to find each other again
You're together, yet you feel alone. Why it happens, what it means, and simple things you can do tonight to feel close again.
10/11/2026
In-laws: setting boundaries without starting a war
Surprise visits, unasked-for advice, holidays to split: how to set boundaries with your in-laws without upsetting anyone, or your relationship.
10/13/2026
Moving in together: what the first year is really about
Chores, money, schedules, time alone: your first year under one roof brings it all up. What to decide together, and how to talk about it.
10/15/2026
When you and your partner don't run on the same clock
Early bird and night owl, craving people or craving quiet: different rhythms don't get fixed, they get worked around. Here's how, in practice.
10/17/2026
Doing projects together, even small ones
A veggie patch, a trip, a recipe to master: shared projects bring couples closer, on one condition. What research shows, and how to start tonight.
10/19/2026
When one of you wants a child and the other doesn't
One of you dreams of a child, the other doesn't want one, or not yet. How to talk about it without hurting each other, and how to decide honestly.
10/25/2026Duoly, the couples app
Tonight’s question, games to rediscover each other, date ideas near you — ten minutes each evening, just the two of you.
